Have You Heard The One About... by Seeker. Rated NC17. No copyright infringement intended.
"A werewolf, a vampire and a veela walk into a pub..."
"Oh. I've heard this
one."
"Not like this, you haven't."
"I don't give a bloody good god-damn what you heard,
Lucius!" Severus Snape hissed at his oldest friend, eyes flashing red and
fangs barely kept in check. "This
is the stupidest mandate Old Vold's come up with in a line of progressively
stupid mandates ever since he regained his corporeal form! It will never work!"
"We have to try," Malfoy responded quietly, eyes
flashing silver as his True Self responded with alacrity to Severus'
agitation. There were few things a veela
liked better than a fully roused vampire.
Or any sort of dark creature, really. There was an energy there that couldn't be
matched with any simpler creature.
Normal wizards gave a veela a slight charge, squibs and muggles none at
all, but when a dark creature was roused... oh, the energy! The zing!
The rampant urge to-
The door closing behind Remus Lupin derailed his train of
thought. Or perhaps it was the wave of
want now rolling off Severus like the room had been doused with a vat of
musk. Lucius barely restrained a moan.
Lupin didn't bother holding back his growl.
"Where's Sirius?" he rasped, his voice low and
threatening.
Beside him, Severus shivered.
Lucius firmly commanded his cock to calm down. His cock ignored him and leapt up to press
against his trouser buttons needily.
Lucius swallowed hard to moisten his mouth enough to speak. Before he could, Severus hissed through his
teeth.
"Thsiriuths ithsn't here." He'd've sounded a lot haughtier without the
lisp.
Lucius glanced sideways.
Yes. Fangs fully extended, lips stiffened
to try to cover them, failing badly.
Severus was ready to jump out of his skin with a combination of lust and
nerves.
He smelled delicious to Lucius' veela senses. Equally as delicious was the wave of musk,
anger, confusion and wariness coming from Lupin. Lucius basked in it for a moment before
wrenching his attention back to the moment at hand.
"Black isn't here, Mr. Lupin," he cut in smoothly, as
Severus fought for composure. "The
message was from myself and Severus. A ruse, if you will."
"To what purpose?" From the way the fur, er, hair at the back of
Lupin's neck stiffened, Lucius knew the wolf didn't believe him.
"To ensure that you would meet with us. On neutral ground. To talk. Nothing nefarious, I assure you." His erection begged to differ, but Lucius
ignored it for the moment.
Lupin slunk the rest of the way into the pub, joining them
reluctantly, as Lucius and Severus eased back into their seats. Another quick glance confirmed that Severus
had his fangs under control, but the tinge of blood still showed in his eye, so
Lucius continued the explanation.
"We have a proposal," he purred. Narrowed amber eyes glared at him,
unimpressed. Lucius took a deep breath,
reminded himself not to veela out in public, and licked his lips. Beside him, Severus made a strangled
noise. Lupin's glare swiveled to cover
Severus and Lucius found he could breathe again.
Damn, the wolf was sexy.
"Please hear us out before you make your decision," he
continued, with a slight hitch in his voice.
The molten amber swung back to him, and he found himself swaying
slightly in pure lust. "Our
proposition is straightforward."
His voice lowered until the others in the pub couldn't overhear. The fact that this caused Lupin to lean
closer, causing a rush of wonderful scent to surround Lucius, was a side
benefit. "Beings such as yourself,
and others with the unfortunate designation of Dark, have been discriminated
against unfairly for centuries. We
propose a world in which wizards and werewolves and vampires and such can live
free of fear, dwelling in the strength of their unique abilities without the
threat of death or imprisonment. No
sanctimonious ministry punishing us for being who and what we are, no ignorant violent
muggles treated as innocent victims when they are in fact the aggressors, no
walking in the dark when we should own the daylight. You smell absolutely wonderful and I want to
fuck you until neither one of us can walk.
Our leader has been much maligned by-"
"Augh!" Severus groaned beside
him, a decided lisp contorting the sound.
Lupin's hands were clamped on the table until his knuckles were
white and his eyes were moon-sized. His
mouth hung open and Lucius wanted to lick his teeth.
The unexpected reaction to his as yet incomplete sales pitch gave
Lucius pause, and he retraced his words.
Then he froze. For a moment, his
skin turned shimmering opalescent and his pupils slanted,
his tongue flickering round his lips as his True Self emerged.
"Merde," he said, trying not to glow too conspicuously
and get them all thrown out. There were
some things one simply didn't do in a public place in
Vamping out was another.
Oddly enough, Lupin didn't look afraid. Or perhaps the oddity wasn't his lack of
fear, nor the fact that he didn't instantly retreat. Rather it was the strangely intense look
piercing both Lucius and Severus.
"You're a veela," he said slowly, his voice very low,
tightening Lucius' nerves and nearly allowing more glow to escape. "And you're a vampire," he said to
Severus. A flash of startling white fang
against reddening lips, before Severus dropped his head to hide behind his hair
again. "So you're telling me this is why you support Voldemort? Because you're dark
creatures and he's promised you, what, the world?"
"Only our rightful plathce in it," Severus replied, then
cleared his throat, embarrassed. Again,
haughtiness was sacrificed to lisp.
Lucius rolled his eyes.
"Partly," Lucius answered honestly, to his own
shock. "Partly because Voldie's
loony as a March Hare and we're all walking lightly around him until the Potter
brat gets around to liquidating him."
"Luth!!" Severus exclaimed.
"You know it's true, Sev," Lucius shot back, mind only
half on what he was saying. The rest of
his attention was on Lupin, and the way he was starting to sweat. Lucius wanted to lick his neck.
"Now, thso doeths Remuths," Severus muttered.
"Bite me," Lucius told him absently. That provoked a moan that was hungry, not irritated.
Lucius grinned. From the way Lupin
now stared at him, he had a feeling his pointed teeth were showing, but he
couldn't care less.
There was something decidedly freeing in giving in to one's baser
self.
"What do you say, Lupin?" he asked invitingly. "Want to join ranks?"
"No," the wolf stated firmly.
Not missing a beat, Lucius asked, "Want to get naked? Together?"
The thunk of Severus' head hitting the table nearly drowned out
Lupin's equally firm, "Yes."
Severus' head shot up so fast it was a wonder he didn't dislocate
his neck. "What?"
"I mean," Lupin said, sounding confused, "er,
no?"
"I'll go with your first answer," Lucius contradicted
him. In the blink of an eye, he launched
himself over the table and caught Lupin's shoulders in his hands, pinning him
to the wall at the back of the booth.
The sweat tasted just as good as it looked.
"Fuck, fuck, fuck," Severus muttered, one of the few
curses he could get out without lisping, though every 'f' nicked his bottom lip
with his fang-tips. Not that Lucius
noticed, being too busy memorizing the taste of turned-on werewolf.
A strong shoulder shoved him over, and Lucius slid round the table
to crowd against Lupin's left side. He
then took advantage of the change in position to clamp his mouth over Lupin's
and start sucking on his tongue. There
was no way for the wolf to escape, as Severus swooped over to Lupin's right
side and began to nibble on the neck left invitingly displayed. Lupin's body jolted under the sensation and
Lucius hummed as Lupin groaned into his mouth.
Who gave a flying fuck what Voldie wanted? This is what Lucius wanted, and Severus too,
and Lupin if the impressively large cock pushing against his palm beneath the
rough material of Lupin's trousers was any indication.
The sound of Severus' tongue lapping at Lupin's neck was
incredibly exciting, and Lucius couldn't hold off any longer. Knowing that at any moment he was going to
start glowing like a torch, and they'd have all sorts of uninvited onlookers,
he wrapped both arms around his booth-mates and apparated them all somewhere
more comfortable.
His bed at Malfoy Manor. His extra large bed, the one reserved for
multiple partners. His
orgy bed.
Oh, yes.
"What the ... oh, god ... where did you-?" Lupin choked as he tried to question his
captors. No doubt from the shock of
Lucius' disrobing spell. Or perhaps
because Severus had his cock down Lupin's throat. Regardless, he stopped speaking and starting
squirming. As it
should be.
Lucius sighed with satisfaction as he ran his fingers up and down and
around and into Lupin's muscular, soft-skinned, exceptionally tight
arsehole. The musky scent was stronger
with all the clothing out of the way, and the wiry hair over most of the
werewolf's human form was a delight against Lucius' body. Veelas didn't have body hair,
and Lupin's tickled most deliciously where it rubbed against Lucius' skin. That, and the scent, and
the heat of the ring slowly yielding to Lucius' questing fingers, promised
heaven.
"Not yet!" Severus hissed suddenly, yanking Lupin's head
off his cock and pulling it up until they could kiss. Lucius looked on with interest. Severus' normally marble-pale skin was
actually slightly flushed, quite an accomplishment for a vampire. Lupin's skills must be impressive.
Perhaps even as impressive as his arse, though from Lucius'
perspective at the moment he couldn't see how anything else could be. Lupin whined into Severus' mouth as Lucius
shifted forward on the bed and pulled his fingers out from the now
greedily-clenching hole.
"Un moment, petit," he whispered, reaching out to hold
Lupin's hips steady as he lined his cock up until the head rested at Lupin's
entrance. The tiny convulsions of the
muscle against the head of his cock were almost unbearable. "Sev? Mords-le!" Severus' eyes flashed red at the command to
bite, and he broke the kiss with a wet sound that, if anything, hardened Lucius
further.
With the ease of long practice, Lucius and Severus took their
prey, Lucius sinking to the balls deep in Lupin's arse as Severus sank his fangs
into Lupin's neck. Through slitted eyes
Lucius saw Severus' shoulder move and could feel by the reaction jolting
through Lupin's body that Severus was milking Lupin's cock with one strong
hand. Lupin's head fell back on Lucius'
shoulder and he gave a choked wail, more wolf than man, as he bucked between
them.
True selves flashed out in an instant for all three. The ferocity of the wolf, the hunger of the
vampire, the fire of the veela, the strength of all three; it was a wonder the
bedchamber didn't combust.
The bed frame did break.
Not that they noticed.
Lucius pounded hard into Lupin's arse, skin glowing as he
transformed, boundaries of skin and flesh of no importance as he blended with
his new lover. Severus thrust
desperately against Lupin's thigh as his hand worked hard on Lupin's cock, and
Lupin's wiry strength between them anchored them all. Lupin came first, howling, thrashing,
trembling, transmitting his pleasure through his blood to Severus, triggering
Severus' climax. The clamp of teeth and
hand wrung the last of Lupin's orgasm from him, a frenzy of movement cascading
through his body that overcame Lucius' control, sending him over the edge as
well. He pressed into and around Lupin's
body, hands tangling in Severus' hair, face buried against Lupin's back, arms
and legs a tangle to the point only the glow differentiated where Lucius ended
and his lovers began.
Severus finished feeding, withdrawing his fangs and licking at the
spill of blood trickling from the wound on Lupin's neck. Lupin shivered along the length of his body,
dislodging Lucius' spent cock, drawing a disappointed sigh from them both. As if to counter the loss, Lupin snuggled his
warm arse back against Lucius' groin, and Lucius nuzzled the sweaty hair at the
nape of Lupin's neck.
They lay there together for some time, the only sounds in the room
their breathing and the shift of bodies against one another on the linens. Lucius was nearly asleep when he heard Lupin
say, "This doesn't mean I'm joining you."
Ignoring the snort Severus gave, Lucius looked down at the utterly
relaxed, sweat- and spunk- and blood-splattered body plastered against his own,
and replied, "Looks like you did, rather thoroughly."
Lupin gave a snort of his own, disguising a laugh from the sound of
it. "You, well, yes. Voldemort, no."
"That's all right, then," Lucius told him sleepily. And funnily enough, it was.
END