Shattered, a
Lucky Spencer's world was shattered.
Yeah,
Where Luke couldn't reach her.
And that had broken Luke. Lucky stared down at the Last Will and
Testament his dad had mailed to him, his hand brushing the surface of the
paper, his fingers shaking. Luke had
tried to rescue his wife, but the woman he'd found was living in a nightmare
from a quarter century before. Long
before Luke came into her life. He
couldn't save her when all she saw when she saw his face was the blood on her
own hands.
Lucky could relate.
More than he could ever explain to anyone, and that's why he'd insisted
to Nikolas that they didn't use drugs on her.
That they let her get strong, let her wander until she found herself
again, as he knew in the deepest part of his heart that she would. Nikolas had looked at him, and seen the pain
Lucky kept hidden from everyone else, and agreed with him. Laura
would find herself, then she'd go looking for Luke, then she'd come back
to Lucky and Nikolas and Lulu and everyone who loved her.
Except maybe Scott Baldwin, because Lucky was going
to kill him. Bury him someplace dark and
deep where he couldn't hurt anyone else in Lucky's family ever again.
Not that it mattered. He poked at the will, the paper crinkling
under his hand. Because he was afraid,
in that same deep part of his heart, that by the time Laura found herself, Luke
would be dead. When Laura hadn't known
him, had turned on him and fought him and run from him, Luke had been
devastated. That was what the will
meant.
He was saying goodbye.
Lucky had to find him. Before he did something stupid, and wasn't
there for Laura to find when she finally stopped hiding.
He wanted to find the old anger, the old fire, and
use it to propel him out the door. But
his feet felt like lead, and his head felt all fuzzy, and he was so tired. Not sleepy, just exhausted, like the most he
could do was sit on his bed and run his hand over the will and stare at the
wall. Forever.
The fog was really tempting. But he couldn't go there. Couldn't retreat. Couldn't leave Nikolas to rescue Luke again,
while Lucky was left in the dark, because he wasn't all that sure Nikolas would
rescue Luke. Again.
His brain was running around in so many circles he
felt dizzy when the key turned in the lock of his door. Instincts kicked in and he almost jumped off
the bed to lie in wait for the intruder ... but his legs wouldn't work, and his
stupid hand wouldn't let go of the stupid will, and he didn't realize he had
tears dripping down his face until the mattress next to him dipped down and
Nikolas wiped the wet off his cheeks.
Lucky blinked, then stared past Nikolas at the
door, closed and locked again. He said,
"That was fast." His lips felt
numb. His tongue felt thick.
"Not really," Nikolas answered, his voice
oddly gentle, the way it was a lot anymore when he talked to Lucky. It used to really piss Lucky off, until he
realized it wasn't fake, it was real.
And it was his own damn fault for making Nikolas unsure of himself,
because Lucky was the one pushing him away.
Nikolas kept coming back.
Took Kristina dying for Lucky to figure that one
out. That didn't seem fair, either, but
then life wasn't ever fair. Or Lulu
wouldn't be sitting at home crying for a mom and dad who were nowhere to be
found, and Laura wouldn't be hiding away in the shadows in her own mind, and
Luke wouldn't be giving up. Nikolas
wouldn't be having to pick up the pieces and Lucky wouldn't be having to go try
to patch together what was left of his life.
"I called your name, but you didn't
answer. So I came in, but you just sat
there, didn't say anything. I figured
something was up, and you probably wouldn't want all of Bobbie's lodgers to
hear about it, so I closed the door. Are
you all right?"
Such a soft voice.
So much concern in those big eyes.
Too much distance between them, like Nikolas was afraid to touch him, as
if he expected Lucky to hit him or run or scream if Nikolas laid a hand on him.
All Lucky's fault.
He knew it. He hated it. He couldn't stand it any more.
His mom was lost, for as long as she had to
be. His dad might already be dead. His sister needed more than he could give
her. But Nikolas was right there, and
Lucky wasn't about to let him go.
Nikolas' mouth was still open, he was saying
something, but Lucky wasn't listening.
He twisted on the bed, turning into the soft touch on his cheek, shifting
until his mouth was over Nikolas' and he could lose himself in the strength
that had always been his brother to him.
Strength, and heat, and welcome, and a need as strong as his own.
They'd always gotten in trouble when they'd
talked. Their bodies were always more
truthful than their words could ever be, because there was no room for pride or
stupidity or anger when skin met skin.
Nikolas made a sound, muffled by Lucky's tongue, that might've been a
protest. Lucky paid no attention,
because whatever Nikolas' mouth might say, his body was saying yes.
It was awkward, trying to get his clothes off and
get Nikolas out of his without losing hold of one another, but they
managed. With a lot of sidetracking, to
kiss and lick and nibble as buttons were opened and zippers were lowered, as
cotton and silk and denim and wool were pushed off and away. The blankets went on the floor along with
their clothes as they twisted around one another, but that was okay, too. As long as Nikolas didn't let go, Lucky wasn't
worried about anything. Couldn't be,
while Nikolas was right there, while this was real.
In that moment, all there was in the world was
Nikolas. His hands on Lucky's hips. His tongue tracing the length of Lucky's
cock. His dark, dark eyes fixed on Lucky's
face. The strength holding Lucky up and
holding him through it, as he curled over, hands buried in Nikolas' hair, and
came down Nikolas' throat.
Shivers went through Lucky, as Nikolas held him and
soothed him, running his hands up and down Lucky's body like he was calming his
horse, and Lucky had to smile at the thought.
Nikolas smiled back, but it was strained at the edges, and Lucky felt
Nikolas move against him. Reaching down,
he caught Nikolas' hand and stopped the motion before Nikolas could come. Then he wrapped his leg around Nikolas' body
and rolled them both over until Nikolas was flat on his back, with Lucky
straddling his hips.
"Don't waste it," he teased, voice husky,
"that's mine." He grinned down
at Nikolas, who grinned right back up at him.
"Your call, Lucky," Nikolas whispered.
Lucky had to lean in and kiss him for that. Nikolas took the kiss and opened it up, slid
it from teasing to deep all the way to Lucky's heart, and the fear that had
been gnawing there eased a little bit.
Lucky felt his throat tighten and his eyes start to tear up, but he
fought it. Nikolas caught the change in
his mood before he could cover it.
"Is this okay?" he asked. He sounded worried, his mouth curving down in
a frown, brows drawing together, hands moving to hold Lucky away. Giving him space Lucky desperately didn't
want.
"Fuck me." Lucky took back the initiative, cursing
himself for hesitating and Nikolas for noticing, then cursing himself again for
making Nikolas so unsure of himself even in this. Reaching behind himself, Lucky lined Nikolas'
cock up with his hole and shifted back onto it.
The head hurt going in, and Nikolas froze.
Not giving Nikolas time to change his mind, Lucky
sat all the way down, hissing as the blunt force of the cock opened him up,
fighting to take it all, even as Nikolas' hands clamped on his hips to try to
pull him back up.
"Damnit, Lucky!" Nikolas spat through
gritted teeth. "I don't want to hurt
you!"
"Then stop fighting it and just --"
Lucky's breath left him in a rush as he felt Nikolas' balls against his ass,
"fuck me already. Oh, god, that
feels so good!" And it did, with
the first burn past, as his muscles unclenched and Nikolas filled him. Lucky rocked his hips a tiny bit, an inch,
another, staring at Nikolas' face the whole time.
Pain, and pleasure, and tenderness mixed
there. The urge to protect, a hint of
irritation at Lucky's heedless rush mingling with the light of laughter because,
after all, that was Lucky. All of it
written in Nikolas' expression as plain as day for Lucky to read. He grinned back in response.
"Feels like home," he muttered, and saw
understanding light Nikolas' eyes before he began to move. Then pure heat washed everything else away.
It had been too long since they'd connected like
this. Too many things got in the way,
too many stupid things that didn't amount to much, really, in the big
picture. Girls, and money, and pride,
none of which meant anything in the face of the fact that they loved each
other. There, at that moment, with
Nikolas' body straining underneath him, with his ass full of cock and his cock
caught in Nikolas' fist and his fingers clenched in Nikolas' hair, all the
uncertainty and fear and emptiness disappeared.
Then Nikolas started shaking, his hips bucked up,
his fingers tightened on Lucky's cock, and Lucky rode him as Nikolas came. His thighs slipped on the sweat running down
Nikolas' hips, his balls drew up at the pressure around his cock, and he could
feel the come pushed back out of his ass with every convulsive thrust Nikolas
gave.
It felt so damned good. Lucky rocked with Nikolas, the motion of his
body slowing as Nikolas came down from his high. When those deep brown eyes opened again,
Lucky pressed his hand against Nikolas' scalp until he was looking back at
Lucky. Then he wrapped his hand around
Nikolas' fist and pushed it on his cock.
Pulled it back. Pushed it again.
Everything splintered, not into the gray fog he
hated, but into a million different colors, as he came all over Nikolas'
stomach, with Nikolas' cock still half-hard inside him, arching his back and
pressing his ass down as hard as he could.
Moaning Nikolas' name. Connecting
to Nikolas with his body, his words, his heart.
When he came back to himself, Lucky was curled up
next to Nikolas, his head resting over the calming beat of Nikolas' heart. His arms were draped around Nikolas' waist
and their legs were tangled up together.
Warm hands rubbed his shoulders, carded through his hair, ran down his
back. He smiled, tongue flickering out
to taste a drop of sweat on the silky skin.
Nikolas groaned softly.
"You okay?" The words were mumbled against the top of
Lucky's head.
"S'gonna be alright," Lucky slurred in
response, already half-asleep. All the
tension, all the numbness, all the fear had been shaken out of him. Now he could do what he had to do.
Tomorrow.
With his brother at his back, maybe Lucky could get
to his dad in time. Then maybe his dad
could draw out his mom, in time. And,
eventually, his shattered world could be whole again.
end, final story in series