Watson, a Relic Hunter story by Glacis
(Nigel/Bruce Adler). Set in and around the episode "Afterlife and Death" including
spoilers. Rated NC17. No copyright infringement
intended.
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There were days when he
wondered why he'd left
He rather enjoyed the
feeling.
This wasn't one of those
days. Yes, the Thutmose Diamond was a huge find. Yes, he admired
There were also times when Syd was depressingly like his Mum. This was one of those
days.
Nigel Bailey stared around
him at the dusty, depressing, dingy and damned hot streets of
They ducked into a
beaten-up doorway, matching in all particulars its surroundings, and he
followed as
"You must be
Nigel."
A shock ran from his
fingers to his shoulders and numbed his tongue. It was the only reason he could
think that he was unable to do more than mumble a greeting. Bruce Adler was
very soft-spoken, taller than he by a good six inches, golden-haired and
golden-eyed. He looked every inch what he was -- an Egyptologist who lived in
the field, wresting history from oblivion and protecting it with every fiber of
his being.
Brilliant.
A lion.
To match
the lioness.
Ignoring for a moment the
bizarre physical response he'd felt when they touched, Nigel forced himself to
tune into the conversation. His eyes shot back and forth between Syd and Bruce. There was something there, a chemistry, a camaraderie. It was familiar, but with
unusual overtones. Unlike Dallas, or Kurt, Francois or even Stewie,
he didn't get the impression Bruce wanted to drag
His thoughts were
interrupted by Sydney, who was giving him The Look. He gulped. Not having any
idea what she was mentally ordering him to do, he barked instinctively,
"No!" Whatever it was, he wouldn't like it.
Then she told him he had
nice legs, and he knew precisely what she wanted.
"No!" The blush
was crawling from his ankles, it felt like, and Bruce was staring at him, the
tiniest grin tilting the corner of his mouth. Nigel stared with some desperation
between the two of him. Don't embarrass me like this,
She couldn't read his mind
any better than he could read hers. An hour later he was sitting in a steaming
bath, shaving foam everywhere (including the end of his nose), slicing his
lower limbs to filets at
He hated dressing like a
girl.
Not as much as he should,
probably, but it wasn't the first time he'd gotten himself turned out as a
femme fatale to support one of Sydney's crazy schemes, or to save his life as
they were fleeing madmen who were out for their blood. At least this time all
he had to do was risk permanent damage to his spine by carting a bloody heavy
basket on his head, trip down stone steps in his bare feet, simper engagingly
for one of the dimmest specimens of Egyptian coppers he could ever hope to
meet, and not kick the bugger in the face for groping his calf.
It was a sheer relief to
slap the bastard in the chops with the basket full of vegetables. For once,
Stepping over the crumpled
bodies of their foes in officialdom, he and
Looked
like Thutmose III had had great press. Glowing rock in hand, he was slaying people right,
left and sideways. Sydney and Bruce got into a discussion about properties of
space rocks and Nigel chimed in with a few comments about the mythology of
fallen Kings and the lack of credibility of meteorites as laser weapons, but he
was continually distracted by Bruce.
The other archaeologist was
standing so close to him they kept brushing against one another. Whenever they
did, that odd little tingle of electricity would run through his skin and make
his spine tingle. He'd never felt anything like it. Perhaps it was something in
the man's natural electromagnetic field that was interacting with his own in an
unusually strong way. Nigel wondered idly if Bruce glitched
computers, then moved even closer to the taller man's warmth.
Whatever it was, he rather
liked it. From the way Bruce moved closer to him in turn, perhaps it was
reciprocal?
"What?" he asked
defensively. Was his wig askew? Kohl smeared around his eyes? What?
"Next time, I'd definitely go with a size six."
Oh, great. Fashion critique. Only
A few hours later, it was
clear what they had embarked upon. A diamond hunt.
With complications, of course, because any hunt involving Sydney Fox inevitably
included complications. This time they included an Egyptian fence who'd flitted, a Korean terrorist with a very large
attendant thug with an even bigger gun, and a sudden trip to
Especially when he realized
he was practically in Bruce's back pocket as they were walking down the street.
So he hurriedly attempted to pull away unobtrusively, landing him with an
armful of Karla, who was anything but unobtrusive. He tried telling her no.
After all, even if he hadn't been distracted by a mission and a diamond and
Bruce's EMF interaction with his own, they were on a public street, even
if it was Amsterdam, and he was certain some of the things she was whispering
in his overheated ear were illegal, even in Amsterdam.
"I tried no,
Twenty minutes later he and
Bruce were ensconced in the lobby of Mustafa's hotel, waiting for their cue.
Nigel hunched behind his newspaper, feeling like a cross between Inspector Clouseau and Doctor Watson, waiting in the hackney with his
service revolver for the brilliant Holmes to spell out the next step for him.
She was incredible. She
could get blood from a turnip. The Dutchman stood no chance.
Nigel watched for her hand
signal and read 3-0-3. He glanced over at Bruce. Bruce was watching him.
For a second, the intensity
of Bruce's regard startled Nigel. He'd been sure Bruce would be staring at
He was beginning to get an
idea why Bruce kept making his skin itch. He wasn't particularly sanguine about
his conclusions.
Nigel stood a discreet foot
away from Bruce in the lift going up, helped in his endeavor to maintain his
composure by the presence of two elderly matrons standing in front of them. He
was congratulating himself on keeping his calm demeanor, given his
just-discovered erotic attraction to
He didn't dare risk a
glance at Bruce. True, his erection had finally subsided, but his blush was
deep enough to be used as a beacon light. Trust
As it turned out, they were
too late anyway. Ko was
already there, with his thug. The room had been tossed. Mustafa had flown the
coop.
Not an unusual circumstance
on one of
Putting aside petty
personal considerations, aware that time was running short to find the diamond, Nigel stuck to
As had been the norm ever
since he crossed the pond and started working for
The crystal fragment let
loose with a burst of energy that sent all four of them to the floor and blew a
hole in the wall of the lab twice the size of a man's head.
Alright. So it wasn't a diamond. It was a
tactical laser weapon. Who knew? Well, other than
Slightly shell-shocked,
they wandered out onto the street, trying to figure out what to do next. It had
now become imperative that the stolen diamond be retrieved, sent back to
As if the thought itself
had conjured him up, Ko
accosted them on the street from the window of his luxury sedan. Nigel sighed,
dropped back to let
His attraction to the man
was secondary to the mission, but it was also undeniably there. He'd take what
he could get and hope no one noticed. He was doing his best not to notice it
himself.
When
Bruce looked bemused.
Nigel could relate.
Once in the taxi,
Nigel couldn't take his
clothes off without bumping into Bruce. It was a small back seat. They were
wearing a lot of clothes. They were in a hurry. They were just doing what they
were told.
It was utterly illicit
heaven.
The hair on the back of his
neck and along his arms was standing up. Their skin kept brushing, forearms,
shoulders, the sides of their hips rubbing together. Goose pimples ran across
his flesh and his nipples peaked. Thanking God yet again for handy cover, he
dumped his clothing into his lap to cover the fact that he was hard as a rock.
It was ridiculous. It was incredible. Bruce was so warm.
Nigel's eyes slid sideways,
and he trembled for an instant before he could stop himself. Bruce was glancing
sideways as well. He looked as though he liked what he saw. Then Bruce's eyes
met his for a moment before sliding away, startled. Nigel swallowed heavily and
concentrated firmly on searching every thread in the sleeve of his sweater. Not
here. Not now. Not ... what? Whatever it was that was happening. To both of
them, it appeared. He wasn't putting a lot of faith in it, though. Bruce looked
almost as confused as Nigel felt.
Damn.
He started to slump back,
but misjudged his position on the seat and ended up leaning part-way against
Bruce, his shoulder tucked under Bruce's shoulder, his left hand on Bruce's
thigh. He jumped sideways and nearly knocked the door open. He risked a glance
at Bruce.
Bruce was staring at him,
an arrested look on his face.
"C'mon, let's hurry it
up!"
Syd's voice rapping out orders was, not
for the first time, a lifesaver. Nigel flashed an extremely nervous smile at
Bruce and concentrated on putting his clothes back on. It was a minor miracle
he could button his trousers.
Back on the street, he was
twitchy, adrenaline making him antsy but unsure which way to jump. Sydney had a
satisfied, happy, hunting expression on her face, compounded by the force of
her personality as she once more gave him The Look. His protesting
"No!" was automatic and, as always, completely futile.
The following interview was
one of the most humiliating experiences he'd so far encountered in a litany of
humiliating experiences as Sydney Fox's Teaching Assistant. Even dressing as a
girl to seduce police guards was better than attempting to portray a man of the
world to a Dutch concierge who had seen it all ... and then some. Bruce would have
been much better at it. But Bruce might be recognized.
Mr. Mustafa had said Mr. Boote could help him out with finding some ... company. Mr.
Mustafa had said Mr. Boote could recommend someplace
to go that he might like. Mr. Mustafa had said that Mr. Boote
could help him with his little problem.
What problem?
He was completely lost by
the time Mr. Boote asked him what his preferences
were. Not having a clue what the man was talking about -- Preferences? A good
book on Assyrian social structure and a nice cup of tea, not a loud and tacky
disco in the middle of the diamond district! -- he
attempted to brazen it out.
"Er, a little of this, a little of that. You know." Nigel certainly
didn't. He attempted a world-weary expression.
Mr. Boote
stared at him forever, before giving him a half-smile and a near-wink. "Of course. You're English."
Nigel smiled at him for a
moment in an agreeable fashion, why yes, he was English ... then the smile
disappeared and he gave him a puzzled look. What did being English have to do
with dance clubs? He didn't have time to ponder it as Mr. Boote
told him the name of a club. Nigel smiled again, more a nervous tic than a true
smile, and got up to leave.
"Ask for Costanza," the concierge suggested. "She can help
you with your problem."
The tic appeared again, and
Nigel escaped. Why did everyone assume he had some sort of problem? The only
problem he had was figuring out what to do about the
way seeing Bruce naked made him react. And he didn't have time to deal with
that. They had a lethal diamond laser ray rock to find.
As he told Sydney and Bruce
what he'd found out and they hailed yet another taxi, Nigel wondered when his
life had become a comic book. And why he hadn't noticed until it was much too
late.
By the time they got to Plastic
Plastique he was beginning to feel put upon.
Chin firm as his intentions,
he looked around the nightclub and thought of himself as a mature man perfectly
capable of handling whatever came his way. As long as Bruce
stayed over by
Immediately,
Rather, he told him
not to flatter himself.
Nigel's world spun again as
the petite blonde, who'd turned out to be a petite blond with a well-disguised
five o'clock shadow and a baritone speaking voice to go with the lilting soprano
singing voice, asked him where he'd gotten his sweater. He managed to blurt out
"Banana Republic" before slinking away as quickly as possible to
rejoin Sydney and Bruce.
Thankfully, she didn't say
a word. Too busy trying not to laugh aloud, probably. Bruce did kindly ask if
he was okay and he babbled, "Yes, fine, thank you very much," before
Bruce spotted Mustafa, and the hunt was back on.
Nigel had seldom been so
thankful for a distraction in his life.
They cornered the weaselly thief and found out they were, once again, behind
the curve. He'd sold it already, and it was going to be cut the very next day.
Visions of a hole the size of a football stadium where
the diamond district used to be dancing in his head, Nigel was unprepared for a
sultry voice whispering in his ear.
The blond was back. He
(she?) handed a small folded piece of paper to Nigel and told him to call Costanza. What was it about this Costanza
that made everyone think she would be perfect for Nigel? Was she even a she? By
now, Nigel wasn't counting on anything. Then a groping swat to his hindquarters
knocked a startled gasp out of him, and he glanced wildly over his shoulder to
see the singer winking at him.
The outside air had never
felt so fresh.
Time compressed, as events
built to a climax. Sydney called in a favor, and Nigel found himself in a
borrowed suit with gel in his hair bollixing up his role as an Earl's son,
while Sydney ran up and down stairs, broke and entered offices, knocked down
security guards, interrupted the cutting of the crystal an instant before the
laser could hit it and turn them all into people-kibble buried in rubble, then
beat up Ko, faced down half the world's
diamond-buying elite, and stomped off to return the relic to the Egyptian
embassy. It was quite a night, the climax of quite an adventure.
It also wasn't over.
The next day there were the
usual formalities with the Egyptian governmental officials and the
A firm rap on the door made
him groan. "I'm asleep,
There was silence, then a voice that wasn't
Nigel was across the floor
with the door open before he even realized all he was wearing were his pyjama pants. He could feel the blush rising from his
waistband, but he couldn't seem to shut the door. Bruce grinned down at him.
Whatever bemusement the man might have been feeling before had apparently been
resolved. He stepped forward, forcing Nigel to step back a foot, then uncurled
Nigel's fingers from the door knob and shut the door firmly.
Once, Nigel'd
been fairly proud of his ability to express himself verbally. Right then, he
couldn't have formed a word if he'd tried. His thoughts were so scattered, and
at the same time so concentrated on one particular subject, that he didn't even
try. Mercifully, he didn't have to, because Bruce was as focused on the topic
as Nigel was.
"Tell me to stop if
you want me to stop," Bruce said softly, voice low and serious as always.
Nigel opened his mouth to ask him what he expected Nigel to stop.
Bruce stepped forward,
gathered him up in a close embrace, and covered Nigel's mouth with his own. So much for talking.
Not that Nigel would have
said no, even if he had been able to speak. Or think. This had been building
since the first time he'd seen Bruce in that disreputable bar and Bruce had
perked up at the suggestion that Nigel had nice legs. The electricity that was
jumping between them made the harnessed power of the laser meteor diamond look
pitiful by comparison. Nigel would have cheered like a boy at a football match
if he hadn't had his mouth, and his hands, full.
This was so much better at
twenty four than it had been at fourteen.
For one thing, Bruce
obviously knew what he was doing. There was an explanation for the lack of
pulsing desire Nigel usually picked up between Sydney and her 'old friends'
when they met up on a mission. It was the same explanation that covered why
Bruce should be touching him every chance he got. It didn't quite cover why
Nigel was so enthusiastic about the whole thing, but that would require
thought, and right at the moment Nigel was too busy acting to worry about
thinking.
Bruce broke contact and
they both drew in ragged gulps of air. Nigel realized that sometime during the
kiss Bruce had managed to move them to the edge of his bed. He'd also managed
to get both hands down the back of the waistband of Nigel's pants and was
cupping Nigel's arse like it was the crown jewels of the Pharaoh. Bruce looked
intently down at him. Nigel nearly swooned, except then he would have missed
what came next, and the only way he was going to miss that was if he was dead.
"Do you want this?
Want me?" Serious brown eyes bore into his. Nigel nodded so hard his neck
hurt. "Tell me what you want." That low voice had gotten smoky and
dark. Nigel managed to stop nodding and tried his best to shrug.
"You." It was the best he could manage.
Bruce's expression grew fierce. Nigel shivered, in a good way.
"Can you be more
specific?" Bruce's voice was getting strained. Nigel considered this a
positive sign, since nearly every part of himself was
getting strained.
"No," he answered
with blunt honesty.
Bruce growled.
Then Nigel found himself
lifted and dumped, carefully, flat on his back in the middle of the bed. The
hands that had been cradling his arse stripped down with swift force, and he
was stark naked under Bruce's hands, his eyes, his mouth. Nigel's hands flailed
about wildly before settling into the thick short strands of golden hair at the
back of Bruce's skull. Then a demanding, starving mouth closed over his prick
and the world went nova.
He really had to work on
his stamina. Not that Bruce seemed to be complaining. But Nigel had a mission,
now, once his bones gelled back into place and his muscles unpuddled.
Bruce was wearing clothing. Much too much clothing. Nigel'd seen all that skin, those muscles, the freckles on
that broad chest, and now he wanted to touch everything he'd seen. As soon as his arms worked again.
With all the strength he
could summon, which wasn't much, he tugged at the hair clenched in his hands.
"Strip," he tried to ask. It came out more a command. Again, Bruce
didn't seem to mind. He slowly untangled himself from Nigel, giving his
softened prick a little kiss that sent one of those electrical jolts through
him and reassured Nigel that all was not yet over. Then Bruce stood up, very
close to the bed, his eyes locked with Nigel's.
He stripped. Efficiently. A little bashfully. It
was the sexiest thing Nigel had ever seen. By the time the workmanlike floor
show was over and Bruce stood, fully erect, staring down at him, Nigel was hard
again. There were times when it paid to be a young man with very few
opportunities for expending masculine energy. It left a lot in reserves for the
once in a lifetime chances that did fall in his lap.
Going on instinct, Nigel
rolled closer to the edge of the bed and, taking a deep breath, took the head
of Bruce's prick in his mouth. Being American, it was circumcised, not
something Bruce had encountered in his limited experience at fellatio. It was a
little strange, being already stripped for action, as it were, but after a few
licks and a tentative suck, he decided he liked it. The little jolts were
constant now, making his tongue tingle, prickling his fingertips, causing his
toes to curl. Every time Bruce's prick twitched in his mouth, his own twitched
in sympathy. As he relaxed into his exploration, his hand moved of its own
volition and began to rub at his sensitive erection.
Bruce drew back, and Nigel
followed, mouth open like a baby bird's, a
disappointed noise escaping him. "Hang on," Bruce whispered, then pushed Nigel back to climb on the bed with him. The
disappointed whimper turned anticipatory.
Shifting him with nudges
from hands and hips, Bruce turned Nigel until Nigel was laying supine beneath
him. Being covered wasn't something with which Nigel was at all familiar, but
it ratcheted the heat up between them until it was almost unbearable. All that
warm skin and hard muscle everywhere he turned, rubbing against him with every
move he made. His mouth was open, and he was whimpering again. Bruce took it as
an invitation, and as his hands did incredible things to Nigel's body, his
mouth did incredible things to Nigel's mouth.
It couldn't last forever,
of course, although by the time Nigel climaxed the second time he was certain
he was going to go mad with the wait for it. Things went hazy, and the world
swung around him as he was turned yet again, lying prone this time with his
face buried in the linens. The hands that had been exploring his hind quarters
were replaced with something larger and more determined. He was so relaxed from
two mind-shattering orgasms in quick succession that the initial pain of entry
was much less than he might have expected. Having not really had any
expectations, this didn't surprise him.
What did surprise him was
the valiant attempt his prick made at a third erection as Bruce fucked him. The
tiny thought hit him that he actually was being fucked, and not only
enjoying it, but vocally begging for more, before the few brain cells still
functioning gave up any attempt at analysis and drowned in pleasure. His
half-hard, leaking prick rubbed against the rumpled bedcover, his fingers
kneaded the sheets frantically, and his hips, with a mind all their own, bucked
up against Bruce with shocking energy considering the rest of his body was
liquefied. A random synapse fired, informing him that that was what a
prostate massage felt like, then Bruce was growling in
his ear and humping up against him, and the last teaspoonful of fluid in his
testicles spurted valiantly onto the bedcover.
He was wet all over,
completely drained, more exhausted than he had ever been, had twelve stone of
semiconscious man draped over his back, and felt ridiculously happy. The grin
on his face was making his cheeks ache. Life as
Maybe
even all four.
Still trying to figure out
which adjectives applied, and if he'd ever walk straight again, and if he
should care, Nigel finally fell asleep.
Leave-taking the next day
was an odd affair. When he'd woken, Bruce had been gone, but he'd left a note.
It was short, to the point, and hopeful. It included his email address, work
and home telephone numbers, and a mail drop where he could be reached
regardless of where his fieldwork took him. It ended with the words 'Thank
you.' Nigel stared at it until he was almost late packing to catch the flight
home.
On the plane,
He was still grinning.
A week later in his email
he received a personal invitation from Dr. Bruce Adler to fly out along with
There were days when he
wondered why he'd left
He rather enjoyed the
feeling.
fin
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